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Tales From The Ravenclaw Common Room (2/?)
dr robert chase house
rsgleek
Title: Tales From The Ravenclaw Common Room (2/?)
Author: [info]rsgleek
Pairing/Characters: The Ravenclaws, some other.
Rating: PG
Summary: Ravenclaw students have a tradition: storytelling. Terry Boot started this tradition and now he holds story nights for his friends. Join them as they discover new worlds through stories (Muggle and wizard alike) and learn some important life values.
Disclaimer: I own nothing but the plot.

 

2. Snow White

It was a rainy afternoon when Michael Corner entered the Ravenclaw common room, his hand bloody.

"Detention with Umbridge?" asked his friend, Sarah Fawcett.

"Yes," replied Michael. "That overweight toad made me write 'I will not act superior' a hundred times."

Sarah smiled sympathetically and went back to the book she was reading. At that moment, Terry Boot and Anthony Goldstein came down the stairs from their dormitory, carrying an enormous bowl filled with a yellow substance.

"Essence of Murtlap?" asked Michael, wincing in pain.

"Yes," replied Anthony. "Terry and I thought it would be more useful if everyone used this bowl. It's large enough."

Michael placed his hand in the liquid and sighed in relief.

"Can't that cause infections?" he asked.

Terry shook his head.

"The bowl has a filter. It removes blood and leaves only the Essence."

Michael nodded and enjoyed the feeling. His hand had stopped hurting completely by now.

"So, Terry, is it story night tonight?" asked Lisa Turpin from by the fireplace. "I promised Dean and Seamus I would tell them when it would be."

Terry shared a look with Michael and Anthony.

"Sure, why not. You can tell the Gryffindors, Lisa."

He walked over to where Sarah was reading her book.

"Hey, Sarah, isn't your boyfriend in Hufflepuff?" he asked her.

Sarah rolled her eyes.

"John Stebbins, Terry, as I have told you a thousand times already."

Terry winced.

"Sorry, you know I'm not very good with names. Could you tell the Hufflepuffs about the story night?"

Sarah sighed and nodded.

At that moment, second-year Stewart Ackerley came down the stairs from his dormitory.

"Stewart, could you do me a favor?" asked Terry.

"Sure, Terry, what is it?"

"Could you stand in front of the common room tonight and help people answer the question?"

Stewart nodded.

"Of course, Terry, but what if I don't know the answer?"

Terry smiled and replied, "Don't worry, Stew, you're a smart lad. I'm sure you'll do just fine."

Later that evening, a large crowd of students was assembled in the Ravenclaw common room. Finally, at eleven o'clock, Stewart entered the room with Vicky Frobisher, Emily Harris and Demelza Robins, three Gryffindor fourth-year girls.

"Is that everyone, Stewart?" asked Anthony.

"Yep, that's all of them," replied Stewart and sat down next to his best friend, Natalie McDonald.

"So, what do you want to hear tonight?" Terry asked. "A Muggle fairytale, a wizard fairytale…?"

"A Muggle fairytale would be nice," said Michael, who was sitting on the ground, his arm around Ginny Weasley's waist.

"All right, then," said Terry. "Accio Muggle fairytales!"

A book came zooming from the dormitories.

"How about we read 'Snow White'?" Terry asked.

No one had anything against it, so Terry started.

"Once upon a time… Wait, wait!"

Everyone seemed startled.

"I forgot something important," Terry said. "Would you like to hear the real version of the story, or the romanticised version?"

Most of the students wanted the real version, so Terry began once again.

"Once upon a time, many years ago, a king and a queen ruled over a distant land."

"What land?" asked second-year Orla Quirke, who was interested in Geography.

"I don't know, Orla," said Terry kindly. "It just says it was a 'distant land'."

Su Li got up and approached Terry.

"How well do you know this story?" she asked.

"Very well, why?"

"Because I think it would be simpler if you told the story from your memory, only sometimes consulting the book."

There was a murmur of agreement.

"Well, if you think so…" said Terry and placed the book next to him. "All right… So, this queen was sad because she couldn't have children."

"Muggles can't have children?" asked little Euan Abercrombie, his eyes wide.

"Don't be an idiot, Euan," said his friend, Rose Zeller. "How would Muggle-borns exist?"

"Some Muggles can't have children," said Anthony. "They don't have spells to help them conceive."

"Thank you, Tony," said Terry. "Well, this queen couldn't have kids, so she was very sad. One winter day, she was stitching something when she accidentally pricked her finger on her needle."

"I hope the needle was clean," said Sally-Anne Perks. "If the needle had been dirty, she could've fallen ill and died."

"Well, she didn't fall ill," said Terry. "A single drop of blood fell onto the snow."

Michael chuckled.

"Well, that must've been one small needle," he said. "And how did the blood end up outside? I thought she was inside."

Terry shook his head and smiled.

"I don't know, Mike, just go with it. Anyway, the queen looked at the blood and said, 'Oh, how I wish I had a daughter with skin as white as snow, lips as red as blood and hair as black as ebony.'"

"Where did the ebony come from?" asked Angelina Johnson. "We know for the snow, the blood, but what's with the ebony?"

Terry checked the book quickly.

"Oh, her window was ebony. Soon after that, her wish came true. She gave birth to a daughter with skin as white as snow and so on. She named her Snow White, but…"

"She what?" asked Seamus Finnigan. "Who names their daughter 'Snow White'?"

"Yeah, poor child," said Susan Bones.

Terry shrugged.

"It must've been a tradition of some sort. As I was saying, she named her Snow White, but sadly, the queen died giving birth."

"See, dirty needles," muttered Sally-Anne.

"So, the king soon married a beautiful, but proud and cruel woman," said Terry.

"Why are step-mothers always evil in these stories?" asked Kevin Entwhiste. "I have a step-mother and she's really nice."

"It's because divorce was scandalous back then," said Michael. "People assumed that if a man married another woman, she was some sort of an evil seductress."

"That's ridiculous!" said Kevin. "My Dad loved my Mum very much, but he can't mourn forever! He fell in love again and that's not something terrible!"

"Well said, Kevin, well said," said Terry. "So, this evil step-mother, the new queen, owned a magical mirror."

"Like the ones we have in bathrooms?" asked Ernie Macmillan.

"Yes, I suppose," said Michael. "Our mirror always flirts with me and it's a he!"

Terry chuckled and continued.

"Every day, the queen would ask,

'Mirror, mirror on the wall,

Who's the fairest of them all?'

and every day, the mirror would reply: 'Thou, my Queen, art the fairest of all'"

"Why did the mirror speak in old English?" asked Wayne Hopkins with a smirk. "Contrary to popular belief, it doesn't make you sound more educated."

"Oh, I don't know, Wayne, these fairytales are confusing," said Terry. "Anyway, one morning, when the queen spoke to the mirror, it replied,

'You, my Queen, are fair; it is true.

But Snow White is even fairer than you!'"

Laughter erupted in the common room.

"That evil bitch got what she deserved!" said Lavender Brown.

"So," Terry continued, "the queen flew into a jealous rage. She ordered her huntsman to take Snow White to a forest and kill her. She also told her that she wanted him to bring her Snow White's heart."

"Wow, she sure is evil," said Fred Weasley.

"Yeah, it makes me happy; we only have Mum ordering us around," said George Weasley.

"The huntsman took Snow White into the forest," said Terry, "but he found himself unable to kill her. Instead, he told her to run away. He caught a wild boar and brought the boar's heart to the queen."

"Yeah, because they look the same," said Justin Finch-Fletchley sarcastically.

"Well, I doubt that the queen ever saw a human heart," said Hannah Abbott.

"So, Snow White was scared and alone in the forest," said Terry. "She ran and ran until she reached a small house. She entered it and noticed how everything seemed small. She went upstairs and saw seven tiny beds."

"Who lives there, seven kids?" asked Zacharias Smith.

"Close, Zach, but not quite," said Terry. "The house was the home to seven dwarves."

"I'm sure Flitwick wouldn't like this. He hates it when people make fun of his height," said Sarah.

"Well, these dwarves weren't teachers, they were miners," said Terry. "When they came home, they found Snow White asleep on their beds. They were so happy they had a guest, so they let her sleep. When Snow White woke up, she was frightened to see the dwarves."

"Well, I would be frightened if seven strange blokes were watching me sleep," said Vicky Frobisher with a smirk.

"The dwarves introduced themselves to Snow White and they all went downstairs to eat," continued Terry. "One of the dwarves told Snow White that they were going to let her stay if she cooked, washed and kept the house clean."

Dean snorted.

"Aren't they a bit needy?" he asked.

"What, they can't cook for themselves?" asked Parvati Patil. "How did they survive up to then?"

"They're probably just lazy," said Terry with a smile. "Snow White agreed with them, because she liked to keep her house tidy."

"Well, this takes feminism back to 18th century," said Wayne.

"Anyway, Snow White lived happily with the dwarves, UNTIL!" Terry shouted and everyone jumped. "Until, one morning, the queen decided to talk to her mirror. When she asked it the same old question, the mirror replied,

'You, my queen, are fair; it is true.

But Snow White, beyond the mountains

With the seven dwarves,

Is still a thousand times fairer than you!'"

"That damn mirror told her!" shouted Dean.

"Oh, yes, we should break it," added Wayne with his usual smirk.

"Well, I don't know how beautiful Snow White is, but she can't be better looking that Julia Roberts," said Kevin Entwhistle.

Some other Muggle-borns nodded in agreement.

"Who's Julia Roberts?" asked Michael curiously.

"She's a Muggle actress from America. You should see one of her films."

Students who didn't know what a 'film' was simply shook their heads.

"What would you recommend?" asked Anthony.

"Hm, 'I Love Trouble' is a good film," replied Kevin. "It came out last year."

Terry cleared his throat.

"Can we get back to the story?" he asked.

Kevin blushed and fell silent.

"So, where were we?" asked Terry.

"The mirror had betrayed Snow White," replied Ernie Macmillan.

"Oh, yes," Terry said. "Well, as soon as the queen found out Snow White was still alive, she got the huntsman executed for lying to her. She went into this secret room no one else could enter. Inside, she made a poisoned apple."

Everyone gasped.

"How dare she?" asked Mandy Brocklehurst.

"She wants to kill our Snowy!" said Dean. "It's not the poor girl's fault she has a terrible name!"

Terry chuckled and continued, "So, the queen disguised herself as an old woman and went to the dwarves' house. She knocked on the door and Snow White came out. The queen told Snowy that she was going to give her an apple for free, but Snowy said that she wasn't supposed to take anything from a stranger."

"Smart girl," said Lisa Turpin approvingly.

"But," continued Terry, "the apple was magical! Anyone who ever saw it, apart from the queen, had to taste it. So, naturally, Snow White took a bite. She fell to the ground and, well, died."

"No!" someone shouted.

"Poor Snow White!" said Susan Bones.

"That evening," said Terry, "when the dwarves came home from work, they found Snowy on the ground. They placed her in a beautiful glass coffin and mourned her for days. A prince was passing through the forest one day, when he noticed her. He thought she was beautiful so he decided to carry her to his castle. The dwarves helped him move the coffin, but they tripped and stumbled. The piece of poisoned apple fell from Snowy's mouth and she woke up."

The whole common room cheered.

"Wait, let me get this straight," said Michael. "She coughed and then came back to life?"

"Apparently," replied Terry, holding back his laughter. "So, the prince and Snowy got married and lived happily ever after."

"What was the romanticised version?" asked Lavender.

"Well, the prince kissed Snow White, broke the spell and she woke up."

After a few seconds of silence, everyone started laughing.

"Sorry?" asked Lavender incredulously.

"The prince was a necrophile!" shouted Anthony.

"The bloke probably just went around kissing corpses!" said Seamus and everyone broke into another round of laughter.

"Especially because the body would start decomposing after a few days…" muttered Michael, disgusted.

"Well, that's it for tonight, folks" said Terry. "I'll let you know when the next story night will be!"

After that, everyone left for their common rooms. Terry sat on the couch, between Anthony and Michael, placing his arms around their shoulders. Yes, Terry was proud, indeed.

 



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